Life Advice
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Ask Anna: What to do when your partner feels insecure about your past
Dear Anna,
I’ve been dating my girlfriend for a little over a year, and for the most part things are great. We’re both pretty sentimental people, but in different ways. I save things — not in a hoarder way, but I’ve kept shoeboxes of old letters, birthday cards and printed photos from past relationships going back to college. I don’t ...Read more
Single File: Intro to the Survey
When I started asking the unmarried about their sex lives, survey mavens told me this was the first study ever to define single people's sexual patterns. Whether that's true or not I cannot say for sure, but I do know my research covers the emotional issues that can make or break fulfilling sexual union -- feelings seldom put on paper.
Deciding...Read more
Ask Dating Coach Erika: How do I tell someone I don't want to see them again?
Why is it that something that should seem so easy – telling someone you’re not interested – is so hard for so many people? I certainly understand that no one wants to hurt someone’s feelings. But, in saying nothing (ghosting, if you will), you’re doing a lot more damage to their feelings than simply telling a high-level version of the ...Read more
Asking Eric: Siblings clash over commemorating deceased sister
Dear Eric: My sister, Olivia, died unexpectedly about a year ago. I received the call. I in turn called my other brother and sister. Of my family, only Olivia and I were close. My brother bullied us mentally and physically during our childhood.
She has an adult son, who decided to let the state take care of things, as they were both transient. ...Read more
Thanksgiving Dinner Dilemma
Dear Annie: This Thanksgiving I will be meeting my new boyfriend's family for the first time, and I am already a bundle of nerves. His mom is hosting a big traditional dinner at their home, the kind with a perfectly roasted turkey, gravy from scratch and about 10 different side dishes. She is known for her cooking, and apparently Thanksgiving ...Read more
Asking Eric: Neighbor’s vacant home threatens property
Dear Eric: The home next door is vacant. I think it is a rental property. There is a huge tree in the front yard that is coming over my property. A tree from this property fell on my house a few years ago. This caused my homeowner's insurance to be canceled because it was considered to be an act of nature.
I need to see if this can be avoided ...Read more
Teaching Kids Resilience, Not Fear
Dear Annie: My 12-year-old son has always loved playing soccer. He is not the most talented kid on the field, but he works hard, listens to feedback and truly enjoys being part of a team. Unfortunately, his new coach seems to have taken all the joy out of it.
From the first practice, this coach has been harsh, sarcastic and impatient. He ...Read more
Asking Eric: Boyfriend’s ex-mother-in-law still comes for coffee
Dear Eric: My boyfriend and I have been in a relationship for four years. His daughter still lives at home. She's kind of estranged from her mother but still gets together with her on Sundays to go to church.
I spend the weekends with him. The issue is that the ex-wife comes into the house and now the ex-mother-in-law is coming over. He even ...Read more
Creativity, Not Conformity
Dear Annie: I am a high school senior trying to decide where to go to college, and I feel completely torn. My parents have made it very clear that they want me to study business. They both work in finance, and they keep saying that a business degree will "set me up for success."
The problem is, I do not want to study business. What I really ...Read more
Asking Eric: Girlfriend’s adult son gets in the way of relationship
Dear Eric: I have a 10-year relationship unmarried. My girlfriend continues to communicate with her 50-year-old son. Having him determine for her what to do in the relationship. She does not want to communicate with me. She tells me one day she loves me, the next day she does not want to talk.
Should I just end the relationship? I've tried to ...Read more
Sibling Relationship in Shambles
Dear Annie: My sister and I were once inseparable. We talked every day, shared everything and leaned on each other through some of life's hardest moments -- including our parents' divorce and the loss of our mom five years ago. But over the last year, something has shifted, and I can't seem to figure out what went wrong.
She's become distant ...Read more
Asking Eric: ‘Friendly’ customer service keeps causing conflict
Dear Eric: Many companies are training their employees to "be friendlier." Now, when I go to pay for my groceries or have bloodwork done at a lab, someone invariably asks me, "so what are you doing the rest of your day?" I find that to be very intrusive from someone I don't know and may never see again. I understand they have been trained so it ...Read more
Electing to End a Friendship
Dear Annie: After 30 years of friendship, raising kids together, losing our parents and a very good mutual friend, traveling together with our families and so much more, my friend told me after the election last year that she had trouble being around "people like me." In other words, I voted wrongly. I told her that I loved her and that our ...Read more
Asking Eric: Parents try to force reunion with estranged brother
Dear Eric: I am in my late 30s. I live halfway across the country from my parents, and don't have the best relationship with them. I also have a brother four years younger than me who I have been estranged from for 20 years.
My brother doesn't live with my parents, but he lives in the same city my parents do. If I visit, my parents will tell ...Read more
Unspoken Feelings
Dear Annie: My friend "Caleb" and I have been close for six years. We met in college, stayed in touch and still talk almost every day. He's been in a relationship for a while, but I recently realized I have feelings for him.
We've never crossed any lines, but it's getting harder to ignore my feelings. I've tried dating other people, but no ...Read more
Ask Anna: My girlfriend gets turned on by outside attention -- what to do?
Dear Anna,
I'm a 31-year-old man in a relationship with my girlfriend (29) for three years. Last week right after we’d had sex, she told me she'd been really turned on earlier that day because a guy at her gym had been flirting with her pretty heavily. She said it like it was just a fun, sexy confession, like she thought I'd find it hot or ...Read more
Asking Eric: After depression, cluttered house seems impossible to manage
Dear Eric: My house has become a mess – clutter everywhere – after going through a season of depression. I’m now in counseling, on medication and finally starting to feel better, but the mess feels too overwhelming to tackle. I’m ashamed to ask anyone for help, and I really want to get my home back in shape on my own.
I’d love to be ...Read more
Torn Between Peace and Parents
Dear Annie: My daughter "Kate" recently got engaged to her boyfriend of three years. He's polite and responsible, and they seem happy together. The problem is that Kate doesn't want to invite her father -- my ex-husband -- to the wedding. She says it's her day and she doesn't want the stress of dealing with him.
For context, her father and I ...Read more
Core Questions (Part 1)
These are the core questions asked of every participant in my sexuality survey of single people. See how your responses stack up against the majority voice.
--Have you experienced close friendships with people who could have been sex partners that did not lead to physical intimacy? (About 85 percent said yes.)
If so, did you become closer or ...Read more
Ask Dating Coach Erika: How do I write a profile to attract the person I'm looking for?
Writing a dating profile can feel daunting. There’s no disputing that, even if you only have to write 750 characters about yourself (that’s about average for most of the dating apps these days … very short, I know). It’s still hard to figure out which exact 750 characters to share.
Too often, a client comes to me asking, “How do I ...Read more
Inside Life Advice
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