ArcaMax

DEAR HARRIETTE: My sister has been living with me for the past 12 years -- ever since she and her husband separated. At first, we were angry with him for how he treated her, but after living with her, my thoughts have changed. I've tried to correct her bad habits and set boundaries to keep my family comfortable, but she doesn't respect me or my ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We've been invited to a combination multi-graduate/Father's Day gathering at an in-law's house. The hosts suggested it in order to honor all the fathers in the family, as well as the three graduates: my husband from grad school, our son from high school and the hosts' daughter from high school. Our in-laws have offered to ...Read more

Dear Annie: My husband and I have been married for nearly 39 years. He has always had a tendency to put himself first -- even before our sons, and now even our toddler grandson -- but I'm at my wits' end over his latest act of selfishness.

His only sister recently suffered a traumatic fall. She was airlifted to a trauma center with a ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I lost my wife of 20 years four months ago after a prolonged illness. I retired at 62 and became her primary caretaker. The job of caretaker is endless and stressful, and yet rewarding. A female friend of many years ("Dinah") came to the memorial. I grieved, attended Grief Share and read articles about grief. I experience grief every ...Read more

I'm flying home in two weeks, and for the first time, I'm apprehensive. This time, I'm an official delegate representing one of my homes to another. Representing countries is a role I've had my entire life, but this has brought up an identity crisis that I had smothered with work, raising kids, and even running for office. It's thinking about ...Read more

Dear Annie: I've been a longtime reader, and a recent column really resonated with me. I'm a couples coach, and I see this pattern often: people who fear conflict tend to suppress their feelings rather than express them. Over time, that silence turns into resentment, and eventually, things explode -- sometimes irreparably.

In the letter you ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My husband's stepmother passed recently after a long illness, and her children specifically wanted our family, including our 2-year-old, to be at her service. When we arrived at the church, I tried to sit in the back pew so I could take her out when she was antsy, but they put us in front with the rest of the family.

Predictably, we ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm going through a bit of a rough patch in my career. I'm still searching for what's next, but it feels like everyone around me keeps receiving new opportunities. The other day I worked alongside one of my friends, and she shared with me that she had gotten a new job with an amazing brand that we both know and love. I was so ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We have become friends with another couple over the past two years, and we frequently invite them for dinner. Lately, I've noticed that the husband leaves the toilet seat up after using the bathroom.

Both my husband and I have a habit of closing the lid before flushing. Is there a way I can politely bring this up with our ...Read more

Dear Annie: My boyfriend and I have been together for eight years. We have an 18-year age gap. I'm 39, and he's 57. We have a strong relationship and have been through hell and back together. God blessed us with our 6-month-old son, "Michael." We have a happy little family.

We also work together. There's been a young co-worker constantly ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My father died by suicide three years ago. My sister, who was initially supportive, later drunk-dialed our mother and said a bunch of nasty things about her and me. Mom didn't cut the conversation short and later told me what was said, which included that Dad had done it because my other sister and I are "unstable" and because he was ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm really struggling with a situation involving my toddler. She's normally sweet and affectionate at home, but lately, her day care provider has told me she's been trying to hit other children during playtime. This behavior has become more frequent, and I'm starting to get concerned -- not just about the other kids, but about ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I would like to hear your opinion on whether or not using "Excuse me" can be rude.

In my opinion, if I can see that a person's activity will only take a minute, it is rude to say, "Excuse me," and expect them to stop what they're doing to allow me to accomplish my task. The proper thing to do, in my mind, is to patiently wait...Read more

Dear Annie: I've been married to my husband, "David," for nine years. We have two kids, ages 7 and 4. Lately, I've been struggling with how much time he spends on his phone. Every night after dinner, instead of helping with bedtime or talking with me, David disappears into the garage or sits on the couch playing online poker. I've brought it ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I am struggling with a recent diagnosis of severe liver disease (non-alcoholic) and need to lose 30 pounds. I have had two bouts of cancer in five years as well as arthritis. I have dedicated myself to explicitly following my doctor's directions to eat organic and low-fat foods and to exercise daily to improve my liver. I face surgery...Read more

Dear Annie: I have a cousin whom I've had a cherished lifelong friendship with.

We meet several times a year halfway between our homes and sometimes at each other's homes with our families. We often would bring each other a little something, such as vegetables from our garden or a loaf of bread from our favorite bakery.

The last time she ...Read more