ArcaMax

DEAR ABBY: At 63, I am the youngest sister of four siblings. We grew up in the turmoil of Dad's alcoholism and hoarding, as well as physical and emotional abuse from both our parents.

One of my sisters, "June," was sexually assaulted by my brother. She's 71 now and hasn't worked since she was in her early 30s. She supports herself on Social ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend recently proposed to me, and I said no -- not because I don't want to marry him, but because of how he did it. He proposed at a baseball game in front of a huge crowd, and it felt completely wrong for me. I don't even like sports, and he knows that.

I've always dreamed of a more intimate and meaningful proposal, ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My company has a return to office four days a week mandate this year. While it's nice to have the in-person camaraderie, co-workers who are conspicuously ill are coming in and spreading their contagion. (My company provides a generous two weeks of "occasional absence," which may be used for sick days, doctor appointments and ...Read more

Dear Annie: I've always been a people-pleaser, and it's wearing me down. My boss, "Mark," constantly asks me to take on extra tasks because he knows I won't say no. Last week, I stayed late three nights in a row to finish a project that wasn't even mine. And it's not just at work, either. My roommate "Rachel" is constantly asking for favors (...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are the parents of three grown sons. Our middle son ("Kurt," age 29) has been in conflict with his younger brother ("Jared," age 26) for more than a year. Kurt started doing stand-up comedy but still works a day job to pay his bills. Jared now has also started doing comedy. We suspect the disagreement started well ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: All of my friends are into running, and lately they've been talking about training for a marathon together. They keep encouraging me to join them, saying it would be an amazing challenge, a great bonding experience and something I'd feel proud of accomplishing. The problem is that I hate running. I've never enjoyed it, and I have...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'm no more a fan of call waiting than Miss Manners is, but I do want to defend its limited utility. I was co-owner and manager of a small business for several years, and I frequently had to act as receptionist by answering our office phone.

If I'm on the phone and call waiting sounds, I ask Party A to wait 15 seconds while I...Read more

Dear Annie: I'm struggling with my mother-in-law, "Linda," and it's starting to cause tension in my marriage. My husband, "Jake," is an only child, and they have always been very, very close. At first, I thought it was sweet, but I've come to realize that when Linda and I have a difference of opinion, Jake will always be Team Linda.

Last week...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My husband retired three weeks ago, and he has been driving me crazy ever since. I'm a night owl, and he's known it since we met 10 years ago. Today, he told me he'd be playing golf with an old friend tomorrow at 8:30 a.m. at a course 45 minutes away and needed to get up at 6 a.m.

I asked if he could be extra quiet in the morning and...Read more

Terrorized by the possibility of being pulled back into the mire of second-class personhood, women these days have put men on trial. It's not usually a conscious decision, more like a self-defensive reflex, and it masquerades as snide criticism, sharp-tongued retorts and guilt-inducing comments. Anything and everything to put him on the ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm getting out of prison soon, and I'm worried about what comes next. When I left home, things were a bit rocky with my family. Some people have stayed in touch, and others created distance, but I wonder if there is space for reconciliation. I am truly sorry for any difficulty I have caused my family. How can my family and I ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am curious what the etiquette is at a gathering when music is playing in a friend's home on the voice-controlled device.

Is it OK for a guest to speak directly to the device to ask it to play a song?

GENTLE READER: Many of us remain skeptical of manufacturers' claims that if only we keep paying for upgrades, tomorrow's ...Read more

Dear Annie: My mom, "Janet," lost her husband -- my dad -- almost three years ago after 45 years of marriage. Their relationship was strong, full of love, laughter and quiet routines. His death was sudden, and it shattered her world. Since then, she's been living alone in the house they shared, and despite gentle encouragement, she refuses to ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I have been with my boyfriend for 3 1/2 years. Before me, he was known for sleeping around. He has never cheated on me that I am aware of, but when we go to social gatherings (or just out), he flirts with other women. If there is another woman in the room, he keeps his eyes on her like I can't see it happening.

When I told him ...Read more