Life Advice
/Health
Heartfelt Responses From Veterans
Dear Readers: I was so touched by all of the feedback from military families. Thank you for your service, and thank you for sharing some of the responses that you have felt most comfortable with. Below are some examples.
Dear Annie: I absolutely loved your response to "Wondering Vet." As a former military member myself, I also found it ...Read more
My Hoarder Brother's Trapping Our Mother
Dear Annie: My elderly mother bought a house on the West Coast to be near my younger brother and me after my father passed away a few years ago. She had always relied on my father to handle finances and major life decisions, so it's been a difficult adjustment for her to take on these responsibilities herself. Even though she purchased the new...Read more
I Ghosted My Friend to Protect My Sanity
Dear Annie: I am, I confess, guilty of ghosting a friend. I used to talk to her daily and had meals with her and her child. I explained to her how we communicated differently, and she just never "got it." After she began sending TikTok videos, I just gave up. While I don't want to hurt her feelings, communicating with her makes me anxious. I ...Read more
Untangling the Lies From a Toxic Relationship
Dear Annie: I'm 23 years old and had been dating my first girlfriend, "Sara," also 23, for almost two years before we broke up just a few weeks ago. Over time, I'd noticed several inconsistencies in her stories, which my family also picked up on. For example, she claimed she was punched and knocked down at a store but showed no bruises or ...Read more
Feeling Forgotten
Dear Annie: I have read the letters from the grandmothers who are feeling left out. I am in the same situation. My mother always told me that when your son marries, he will be more connected with the wife's family. I have found that it is true. They have not forgotten us. We get our share of holidays and are acknowledged on birthdays, ...Read more
Healing After Accusations and Heartbreak
Dear Annie: A relationship I had for two and a half years has recently ended. I met a woman, "Marie," through mutual friends, and we quickly became best friends, eventually turning romantic. She was the first woman I ever dated, and while our relationship had its ups and downs, the challenges were unique. She had rare health problems and a ...Read more
When Is It Time to Walk Away?
Dear Annie: How do you know when it's time to let go of a marriage?
Twenty-eight years ago, I had an affair. We managed to work through the turmoil, and we've had some good years since. But lately, we're just coasting through life, merely existing.
Not long after the affair, he started drinking. To this day, he still blames his behavior on ...Read more
Navigating Friendships After Loss
Dear Annie: It's been two years since my husband passed, and at first, my friends were wonderful -- calling, visiting and sending cards. But now that I'm ready to get out again, something strange has happened: I'm rarely included anymore. My husband and I used to be invited to dinners, so why am I left out now? What's the difference between ...Read more
Stuck in the Past
Dear Annie: I've reconnected with a high school friend, and it's been fun catching up. However, she constantly talks about the past, and I'd rather focus on the present. How can I gently shift our conversations to more current topics without making her feel like I'm dismissing our shared memories? -- Ready for the Now
Dear Ready: It's quite ...Read more
Overcoming Family Guilt and Setting Boundaries
Dear Annie: I'm a 50-plus married empty nester with a full-time job and three dogs. Life is still busy for us.
My mom, stepfather and younger half-brother live in another state. My father died when I was young, and my mother remarried and had my brother. At 17, I moved out and have been mostly out of sight, out of mind to my family. Although ...Read more
Slighted by Not Being Invited
Dear Annie: I don't know how to act. My husband's nephew is getting married in another state. We heard all the aunts and uncles were invited, but we never received a save the date or an invite.
My sisters-in-law and mother-in-law are aware that we didn't get an invite. A couple brothers-in-law asked if we were attending the wedding -- ...Read more
Celebrating on Your Own Time
Dear Annie: I often read letters from parents and grandparents expressing sadness about not being able to spend holidays with their children or grandchildren, and I'd like to offer a suggestion based on my own experience.
Growing up, my parents divorced when I was young, and holidays were often split between households. However, my mother ...Read more
Let Down by Longtime Friend
Dear Annie: I've had a friend for over 30 years whom I've always helped out. I provided him with work when he needed money, loaned him money, and supported him through his divorce and various other issues over the years. I was always happy to do so and never expected anything in return.
A couple of years ago, he was selling some furniture ...Read more
Snubbed by So-Called Friend
Dear Annie: I tend not to tell people when they hurt my feelings because it feels rude to correct others' choices. This is especially true when it comes to social invitations. A few weeks ago, I had lunch with someone I consider a very close friend. We see each other a few times a month and have even traveled together. During lunch, they were ...Read more
Feeling Forgotten
Dear Annie: I've been in a relationship for almost four years now, and while things with my partner are great, I've been feeling increasingly frustrated by how his family treats me -- specifically when it comes to birthdays. His family has this tradition where they celebrate every member's birthday with gifts, cards and a special ...Read more
My Husband Won't Respect My Privacy
Dear Annie: I have had a few health issues recently. During tests, my doctor incidentally found a mass on my spleen. I asked my husband not to tell anyone, except our kids who are 24 and 33.
I found out he told the neighbor down the street. I am upset. I haven't said anything yet to the rest of my family or friends. He argued (yes, argued) ...Read more
The Struggle to Find In-Person Therapy
Dear Annie: I read your postings in our local newspaper every day, and I've noticed that you often tell people to seek help from a professional counselor before making big decisions.
I agree this is an important step, but I've found that counselors and psychologists are so busy that they either aren't taking new clients or they only want to ...Read more
Family Fallout
Dear Annie: I am struggling with conflicting feelings over feeling disrespected by family members. I was not especially close to my sister, but we did see each other occasionally and text/talk on social media.
My stepdaughter was attacked and bitten by my sister's dog a couple of years ago. My stepdaughter's biological mother chose to sue my ...Read more
Parent Left Behind
Dear Annie: I'm sitting here contemplating my life. I'm 65, ill and live alone with my little dog. Fifteen years ago, my only daughter asked for space while completing her master's thesis. I gave her space, but since then, I've only seen her about five times. I've begged her to talk to me and asked for her forgiveness, but nothing has changed....Read more