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Dear Annie: I have been married to my husband, "Dave," for 22 years. We met in college, and back then he was funny, attentive and full of life. We built a life together, raised two kids, managed careers, took family vacations, hosted holidays and always tried to be a united front, even during hard times. I have always thought of our marriage as steady and loyal, not overly romantic, but rooted in deep friendship.

Now the kids are grown and out of the house, and suddenly the silence between us is deafening. We sit across from each other at dinner and talk about errands, bills or the dog, but never anything deeper. I try to start real conversations, but Dave either brushes me off with a joke or gets defensive and says I am always making problems. He spends more time on his phone or watching TV than engaging with me. And when I suggested we try couples therapy, he laughed and said, "What for? We're not like those people on talk shows."

I find myself crying when I am alone, even though nothing is wrong on the surface. I feel more alone in this house with him than I ever did when he traveled for work. I don't know if we are just in a rut or if the connection we once had is gone for good. Is this normal after so many years? Am I expecting too much, or is it time to face the possibility that Dave and I have grown too far apart? -- Feeling Invisible in My Own Marriage

Dear Invisible: You are not alone -- many long marriages hit this silent wall once the kids are grown and the distractions fade. But love cannot survive on autopilot. You've reached out, and he's brushing you off. That's not partnership; that's avoidance.

Marriage is a two-way street. If one person is doing all the reaching, all the caring and all the hurting, it's time for a wake-up call. Try one more honest conversation. If he still refuses to engage, consider counseling for yourself and try to ask for marriage counseling one more time. You deserve connection, not just company.

Dear Annie: My adult son barely calls or visits anymore, and when he does, he seems distracted and impatient. I raised him with love and always tried to be there for him. Now I feel forgotten. Should I say something or just give him space? -- Feeling Left Behind

Dear Left Behind: I'm so sorry you're feeling this way. When children grow up and build their own lives, it can sometimes feel like we've been left in the shadows. But try not to take his distance personally; it may have more to do with the pace and pressures of his own life than with how he feels about you.

That said, your feelings matter. A gentle, honest conversation might help. Let him know you miss him and would love to hear from him more often -- not out of guilt, but because you care and enjoy his company.

Give him the gift of grace, but also give yourself the comfort of connection. Sometimes a simple reminder is all it takes to bring someone back a little closer.

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"How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?" is out now! Annie Lane's second anthology -- featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation -- is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.