Most Americans would be overjoyed if politicians and political activists would cool their rhetoric. Despite the claims of activists on both the left and right, all policy questions aren’t “life or death,” and those on the “other side” aren’t necessarily ignorant and evil.

Although political conflict is inevitable, we each have the power to steer disagreements away from name-calling and rhetorical head-butting. If we want the activists and politicians to behave differently, the citizens need to behave differently as well.

First, we need to grow personally and make sure our school-age children do the same. Some argue we are experiencing the dawn of a post-literate society, where reading and writing are being made redundant by primarily passive communication methods. Artificial intelligence tools are relieving us of the active search for knowledge and can even write persuasively on our behalf with a few key prompts.

To have better, fuller, more informed interactions with others, we need patient temperaments and interesting ideas. You can’t obtain these through doom scrolling — only through new experiences in both the world around us and in our own minds.

We also need to be more tolerant of those who disagree with us, and teach our children tolerance as well. We need to open our minds to other points of view. Sometimes the other side makes sense; it may even be right on occasion. Is that simple truth being taught in schools?

We need to assume good intentions. Too often, we argue or fight because we think other people are dishonest, ignorant or evil. The truth is: People can, and usually do, have sincere and well-informed opinions that differ from our own.

We need to check our premises and our facts. None of us is infallible. It’s a good idea to challenge our ideas regularly — another lesson that should begin in school.

We need to avoid ascribing ideas and beliefs to others based on assumptions, hearsay, innuendo or their personal background or physical appearance. When we do so, we do them an injustice and stymie meaningful engagement.

We need to engage with others — especially those outside our usual echo chambers. During the pandemic, discussion “salons” regained popularity, with people getting together, typically outdoors, for some face-time “IRL” (in real life). As life returned to normal, the practice declined. Such in-person get-togethers, even as social occasions without any agenda, are essential — and almost always are more civil than online conversations because we’re sharing space with others.

We need to get comfortable with disagreement. As Michael Reitz wrote recently in the Detroit News: “A sad reality in American culture right now is that we’re uncomfortable with disagreement. We encounter a differing opinion, and our instincts are to avoid, dismiss or demonize the other person.”

This behavior is now spilling over into schools and classrooms, with many social studies teachers, according to Emma Humphries, chief education officer of iCivics, saying they fear having classroom discussions veer into politically sensitive territory. We shouldn’t fear disagreement; it’s a valid outcome of any conversation worth having.

We need to listen respectfully. Too many of our interactions today are regarded as winner-take-all contests: “Heads I win, tails you lose.” In many cases, we fail to listen because we’ve already decided how to respond. Instead of employing rhetorical tricks to score points against those with whom we disagree, we should treat political conversations as exchanges of ideas.

Civil exchange is critical as we approach the 250th anniversary of the United States. After the Revolutionary War, founding father Benjamin Rush, a medical doctor, noted that the war was over, “but this is far from being the case with the American revolution.”

Even today, Americans who see in this continuing American “revolution” a path toward increased freedom for all have options. While many politicians, activists, podcasters and others will attempt to keep us at odds, don’t take the bait. Do your part to curb it.

If we hope to bequeath an ever-more perfect America to children, listen more carefully, and set a good example by turning down the volume — and the heat as well.

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ABOUT THE WRITER

Richard Lorenc is president and CEO of Lexandria, an education nonprofit that seeks to reignite the American spirit through innovative classroom content and tools. He wrote this for InsideSources.com.

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