Life Advice
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Asking Eric: Used car sale leaves neighbor feeling betrayed
Dear Eric: Almost a year ago, my husband, “Bob,” bought a 17-year-old car with 200,000 miles on it from a neighbor, “Jane.” It was in bad shape but ran well.
Last week Bob bought a car with 100,000 miles on it. I put sale ads for the older car on a popular social media site that I know Jane is on, and an ad in the local paper which I ...Read more
Older Friends Hang Out While Reader Works
DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently have become friends with a group of older women. We get along great and have had some wonderful conversations and enjoyable times hanging out together. The thing is, they have way more time on their hands than I do. They are either fully retired or semi-retired. They have no problem spending a leisurely afternoon ...Read more
Gift-Grab Or Honest Request?
DEAR MISS MANNERS: A graduate from a Seven Sisters college, who is the child of a doctor and a lawyer, sends out announcements with a link to her wish list for classroom items.
Is this a subtle request for gifts for herself, or truly a wish to stock her classroom?
GENTLE READER: Well ... Are the requests for construction paper and colored ...Read more
Babysitting or Back-Seat Parenting?
Dear Annie: My husband and I have a 3-year-old daughter, and we're trying to raise her with structure -- regular bedtime, limited screen time and no sweets before meals. The problem is my mother-in-law.
She watches our daughter twice a week, and despite repeated conversations, she ignores every boundary we set. She lets her stay up late, ...Read more
Gay Man Is Hurt By Family Members' Hateful Posts
DEAR ABBY: I am a gay man who has been with my husband for more than 30 years. He's from a different culture, as are our now-grown adopted children. Most of my family members are religiously and politically conservative. They have known I was gay since I was in my 20s and almost always accepted us, but they are often critical of differences in ...Read more

Asking Eric: Senior siblings try to find a way to talk without conflict
Dear Eric: My sister, age 86, and I, 84, have two younger brothers, 77 and 74. We have all been invited to share Thanksgiving with one of my brothers and his wife. We siblings are spread out geographically and are not particularly close but not estranged either.
We all agree that “the girls” had a significantly different upbringing than “...Read more
Navigating New Friendships As An Adult
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm trying to manage my social life as an adult and explore new ways to make friends. I always made friends at school, with kids in my grade or from my classes, but now navigating the real world on my own, without proximity and closed environments to steer the way, has been challenging. An acquaintance invited me to a gathering ...Read more
Guest List For Team Party Has Expanded
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am on a team in an adult sports league. At the end of the season, the team decided to have a party. One of the members volunteered to host it, but then decided to invite other people who aren't associated with the team.
The get-together is no longer a "team" party. Is it proper etiquette for someone who volunteered to host ...Read more
When Friends Pull Away
Dear Annie: My best friend, "Cara," has been dating a guy for about six months who, frankly, none of our friends can stand. He talks over her constantly, makes inappropriate jokes, and once made a rude comment about her weight right in front of us. She brushed it off like it was nothing, but I could tell she was embarrassed.
Since she started...Read more
Mother's Physical Discipline Leaves Witness Unsettled
DEAR ABBY: I was shopping recently and encountered a mother who had her two young children in her cart. One of them was making a loud noise. The mother slapped her hard across the face, yelling, "You're not getting what you want, so BE QUIET!" I felt I should say something, but I didn't want the situation to escalate. What would an appropriate ...Read more
Single File: Workaholism -- Part 2
The first step in rehab for a workaholic is to say out loud: "I am a workaholic. I've been using my work to hide from issues in my life." Believe it or not, this seemingly simple statement has enormous transformative power; it's a clear beginning. Next, get out your appointment book and a red pen and do the following:
1) On every page of your ...Read more

Ask Dating Coach Erika: Should I keep secrets from my partner?
I recently got a question from someone on my mailing list, not a client (so I don’t know their details intimately) but a person who seeks dating advice, and that question was this:
“Is it good to have some secrets in a relationship? Isn't that one of the many things that attracts a person… a little mystery? Are there things that you ...Read more

Ask Anna: Should I break up with someone I love but don't desire?
Dear Anna,
I'm a 31-year-old man who's been with my 27-year-old girlfriend for three years. We met through friends and clicked immediately — our conversations flow effortlessly and we laugh constantly together. But I'm struggling with something that's eating me alive: I'm losing physical attraction to her. When we started dating, I knew we ...Read more

Asking Eric: Years after parents’ death, friend still hasn’t dealt with inherited property
Dear Eric: I have a friend I'll call "Sally.” She is in her mid-50s and is single with no kids. Both of her parents are deceased. Prior to her mother's death, she quit her job to care for her. Once she passed, Sally inherited most of her property, including her older van, condo and belongings.
She has sorted through her mother's belongings ...Read more
Sibling Wants To Help Sister Going Through Divorce
DEAR HARRIETTE: My sister recently went through a divorce, and it's been difficult for her. She has two young kids, and I can see how overwhelmed and stressed she is, trying to juggle her work, taking care of the kids, managing the household and trying to keep her life on track. I want to be there for her, but I'm not sure of the best way to ...Read more
She's On The Phone, Dad
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I came home from work one evening and found my daughter on the phone, so I passed her a note. She immediately said, "I am on the phone, Dad."
I was upset by this response, and asked who she was talking to -- to make sure I didn't interrupt anything important -- but it happened to be her boyfriend.
Am I overreacting, or she ...Read more
No Closure, No Invitation
Dear Annie: My supervisor and I worked closely together for more than 30 years. Over that time, he became more than a boss; he was a friend. Even after he and his wife retired to Florida, he kept in touch, calling every week or two to check in with a handful of us from the old office. When he was back in town visiting two of his children, he ...Read more
Siblings Not Interested In Sister's Vengeful 'Party' For Dad
DEAR ABBY: My father was a terrible person. He was physically abusive to his wife and kids, and he sexually abused both of my sisters. He was a vicious bully who took every opportunity to humiliate his children and took pleasure in destroying things we worked hard for. No one in the family is sad that he's no longer with us; most of us are happy...Read more

Asking Eric: After missed birthday party, friend stops calling
Dear Eric: I've been friends with a girl for at least 10 years. Recently she had a
birthday and our circle of friends planned on going to a local bar to celebrate. I decided not to attend because I wasn't able to afford a $10 cover charge. I told her that and she seemed to be OK with it.
But then I noticed that I wasn't hearing from her like I...Read more
Employees Take Advantage Of Summer Hours
DEAR HARRIETTE: Summer is over, but I feel like my staff is still working at less than full capacity. Every year, I give them time off during the summer, which usually includes half days off on Fridays and shorter hours. The expectation is always that they will crank it up when the fall comes. It seems, though, that everyone is asleep at the ...Read more