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Q: My 15-year-old son is very shy and nervous around girls his age. I'm looking for ways to give him a boost in this area. Any suggestions for making him feel more confident in mixed company?

Jim: Realistically, millions of 15-year-old boys are nervous around girls! So, this is a very common situation.

I think most of us can remember how incredibly challenging the early teen years were (and are). There are significant physical and emotional changes that go along with puberty. Kids are dealing with peer pressure and want desperately to fit in and be popular. That's especially applicable in relating to the opposite sex.

Most teens are very self-conscious about how they look, act and are perceived by others. One of the best ways to combat self-consciousness is to reach out to others. Teens who get involved in service projects often feel a tremendous sense of fulfillment. And in the process of serving others, they begin to focus less on themselves and build more confidence.

So, one thing you might try is to encourage your son to join an organization or club that is service-oriented. School counselors should be able to recommend some good ones, either at the school or in the community. Even better, find a church youth group that prioritizes service while emphasizing personal and spiritual growth.

As your son gets involved in one of these groups, encourage him to develop some non-romantic friendships with girls to whom he isn't necessarily attracted. Teenage boys tend to stumble all over themselves around the pretty, popular girls. As he develops relationships with young ladies who he doesn't find so intimidating -- but who have solid character -- he'll learn how girls think and relate. And he'll begin to feel more comfortable and confident around women in general.

Q: My wife recently gave birth to our first child. I love our daughter very much. But whenever my wife asks me to help with the baby I get frustrated, especially when I'm in the middle of something else. I know I'm being selfish -- how do I overcome this?

Dr. Greg Smalley, Vice President, Marriage & Family Formation: You're not alone -- it's common for new dads to struggle in adjusting to a new baby. Some men feel a bit "left out" when they discover that virtually ALL of their wife's time and energy is now directed toward the child. Furthermore, some guys just find it hard to relate to an infant.

The good news is that you're aware of what's happening. You understand that you MUST find a way to put the needs of the baby above your own. Your infant is totally dependent upon you and your wife right now. As you're learning, the job of a parent involves a great deal of patience and self-sacrifice.

It's important that you express your feelings of frustration to your wife. If you've been feeling ignored or lonely since the baby arrived, say so. Naturally, most of her attention has to go toward the child for now -- that's a fact of life you have to adjust to. But it's also crucial for new parents to make sure that their "couple" relationship doesn't suffer. Having a regular date night, even with a newborn at home, isn't that hard -- just ask a friend or relative to watch the baby for a few hours each week. That can go a long way toward keeping your marriage healthy.

That said -- if you find yourself actually feeling true anger toward the baby, there may be some deeper issues that you need to address with a professional counselor. Start by calling our team at 855-771-HELP (4357) or visiting FocusOnTheFamily.com.

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Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at jimdalyblog.focusonthefamily.com or at Facebook.com/JimDalyFocus.

Copyright 2026 Focus On The Family. (This feature may not by reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without written permission of Focus on the Family.)

COPYRIGHT 2026 Andrews McMeel Syndication. This feature may not be reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without the written permission of Andrews McMeel Syndication.